He's Gone
by FarAnya
Summary: What Aeryn and the rest of Moya's crew did when John left through the wormhole in "A Human Reaction".


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HE'S GONE

by FarAnya 

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Author's note: The usual disclaimer. Aeryn, John and the rest of Moya's crew are properties of Jim Henson Entertainment, the Sci Fi Channel, etc. I have enjoyed my playtime with these wonderful characters, and hope to be allowed to continue their incredible journey with them. Spoilers: A Human Reaction. Note: Aeryn's thoughts are in Italics. ~~~ indicates a time lapse. Archiving: Please ask first.

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"He's… off my sensors. He's… gone." Pilot's voice carried nuances of surprise and sadness.

__

He's gone? Oh god… I can't… breathe. 

Come on, Aeryn! Chin up! Eyes forward! No reaction. You're a PeaceKeeper, remember… a warrior. They'll think you're weak if you let them see how much those two little words hurt. But damn, they do hurt! Why? I haven't known Crichton that long. Why does knowing that I'll never see him again hurt so much? I don't know if I can bear it.

"Aeryn?"

Zhaan's gentle voice broke through Aeryn's near-mindless terror. Forcing herself to turn away from the viewscreen, she faced Zhaan, hoping her eyes didn't reveal her panic.

"Are you all right?" Zhaan asked, her own tears coursing unheeded down her cheeks.

"Yes… I'm fine. Why shouldn't I be?" 

__

Just because my heart is being torn in two? Why shouldn't I be fine?

"I just thought…" Zhaan let her voice trail away as she watched Aeryn square her shoulders and clear her face of any trace of concern for Crichton.

"Thank you, Zhaan. I know you mean well."

Aeryn's voice was as hard and implacable as ever, but Zhaan knew that the former PeaceKeeper was anything but all right. She had observed the growing friendship between the Sebacean and the Human. She knew that Crichton felt more for Aeryn than she for him, but of late, Zhaan noticed that their relationship seemed to be changing… for the better to her way of thinking.

Aeryn turned abruptly and walked purposefully from Command. 

__

Hang on… just a little longer… just let me get to my quarters without any more questions. 

~~~

D'Argo found her there almost an arn later, sitting, staring at the flight suit spread across her bed. 

"Ah, Aeryn. I see you are thinking the same thing I am," he said entering the room.

"Wha… aat?" She jumped at the deep growl from the Luxan. She hoped he didn't notice how her voice wavered.

"The wormhole is still there. Pilot says that it has stabilized. We can investigate the outer edges. We might even be able to pick up transmissions from Crichton," D'Argo said.

"Investigate…? It's still there?" With a great effort Aeryn yanked her wandering thoughts into order and focused on the Luxan.

"Yes, the wormhole is still there," he replied in exasperation. Then he looked closer, saw the remnants of tears on her cheeks and asked with more concern than he normally exhibited, "Are you all right?" 

"Yes, of course I'm fine. But I don't understand why you said that we were thinking the same thing," she answered.

D'Argo glanced at the flight suit on her bed. "You have your flight suit out. I thought you must want to take a closer look at the phenomenon."

Aeryn stared at the steel black garment; she didn't even remember getting it out of her locker. 

__

No, I don't want to 'take a closer look.' I want to go after him, she thought wildly. But aloud she said, "Yes. I think we should. Give me a quarter of an arn and I'll meet you in the transport hanger."

"Right." D'Argo gave her a brisk nod and turned to leave.

Aeryn punched her comm badge. "Pilot."

"Yes, Officer Sun?" came Pilot's immediate response.

"Have the DRDs get my Prowler ready," she requested as she bent to unfasten her boots. She was pleased to note that not only had her voice returned to normal, it almost rang with repressed excitement.

"I'm having the DRDs prepare the transport pod. I'm afraid you won't fit in the Prowler," Pilot said diffidently.

Aeryn straightened up at that. "What do you mean… 'won't fit'?" 

Pilot couldn't miss the implacable tone. He was rather glad that he hadn't made visual contact with her; he could imagine the anger flashing in her eyes without help.

"Dominar Rygel is also accompanying you," he explained.

"What the frell for?" she demanded. 

The sharpness in Aeryn's voice told Pilot that the little Hynerian had better behave or he might find himself dropped out the transport pod's airlock. "He didn't give a reason. He simply stated that he wished to go," Pilot said. He knew Aeryn wouldn't be pleased with the answer, but it was the only one he had to give.

"Well, he can't go! This isn't a frelling sightseeing trip. D'Argo and I are going to examine the wormhole... that is all!" 

"I tried to explain that to him, but he still insists on going." Pilot's voice indicated that he really had tried to dissuade the Hynerian royal from going, but that he had had little success.

Aeryn shook back her hair, sighed and said, with as much graciousness as she could muster, "Very well, Pilot, thank you."

"Thank you, Officer Sun. The transport pod will be ready in 225 microts/less than a quarter of an arn(?)."

Aeryn broke the connection and hurried to finish getting into her flight suit, muttering all the while. _That little slug… better stay… out of… my way…_

Aeryn reached the transport bay only a moment behind D'Argo. She pointedly ignored Rygel, who was waiting in the transport pod's airlock. She focused on the pod itself, performing the exterior pre-flight check. 

Entering the transport pod, Aeryn sat in the pilot's seat. She smiled to herself as she settled in. She always felt happiest behind the controls of anything that defied gravity. Although the pod was a Malverdian mammoth compared to the sleek elegance of her Prowler, it had sufficient maneuverability.

__

Right. Let's get going. Maybe we can pick up something from Crichton's module. I should have thought of this as soon as he disappeared into the wormhole.

Aeryn finished the pre-flight check as the other two strapped themselves into their seats. Within microts Pilot informed her that she had sufficient thrust reserves to safely avoid the effects of the wormhole.

"Thank you, Pilot. Are you receiving us on all channels?" she asked as she began the preliminary undocking procedures.

"Yes, I am reading you clearly on all channels. The phenomenon shouldn't disrupt communications unless you get too close. You are clear to undock, Officer Sun." Pilot gave her a slight nod.

"Confirmed. Clear to undock." With that Aeryn lifted the pod smoothly from the transport hangar deck. 

They approached the outer rim of the wormhole from an oblique angle. As they quartered the space around the mouth of the phenomenon, D'Argo fed data back to Pilot.

"Radiation levels are nominal. Subspace distortion is well below minimum tolerance levels. We should have no trouble maintaining communications." 

"Agreed, Ka D'Argo," Pilot answered briskly. "But I'm reading some type of power spikes emanating from the phenomenon. Do you see them?"

"Confirmed, Pilot," Aeryn answered. "I see them. Are they random or is there some kind of pattern?"

"Unknown at this time. Moya's scans have only begun picking them up, so I have no quantifiable data." Pilot sounded apologetic.

"Don't worry," D'Argo said grimly. "We won't be going anywhere near the spikes, Pilot. Not until you can tell us their periodicity."

"That may take some time. I'm not sure if Moya is picking up all the spikes… some are very small, hardly visible outside the mouth of the wormhole." Again Pilot's voice sounded anxious.

"Thank you, Pilot," Aeryn said. Turning to D'Argo she said, "Okay, watch for the random spikes. We'll probably get a better view of them from here, than Pilot can from Moya."

"Right."

"All right, Your Eminence," Aeryn's voice dripped with sarcasm. "Since you insisted on coming, make yourself useful… monitor communications. See if you can pick up anything from Crichton."

"I'm not your lackey to order around," Rygel growled. "You aren't even an officer anymore!"

"Be careful, little toad," the former PeaceKeeper said, her voice menacingly quiet. "I'll drop you out an airlock someday." 

Aeryn's smile was gruesome and Rygel didn't like the gleam in her eye. "You can't threaten me," he blustered.

"Sit back and watch." She swiveled in her seat to stare intractably over her shoulder at the Hynerian. "Now do it!"

Reluctantly, Rygel flipped the switches in front of his raised seat. "Pilot, what channel was Crichton last using?"

"Sa… -gain." 

Static… 

Rygel stared at the communications displays. Nothing on any of them indicated any kind of disruptive influence. Feverishly he toggled controls, but nothing cleared the communications board. Aeryn nodded grimly to D'Argo and watched as he activated other diagnostic equipment. Rygel tried again to cut through the static. "Pilot! Do you read me? Come in, Pilot!"

"I can bar- … -ou. You're sig- … up! … -me back! Imme- … - tely!"

"It must be the power spikes," D'Argo said as he and Aeryn exchanged glances that spoke volumes. Each knew – with a fair degree of certainty – what was about to happen. And they also knew there was probably nothing they could do to stop it.

__

My god, this is it. This must be what Crichton experienced. 

"Evasives!!" D'Argo bellowed. "Full reverse thrusters!"

"I'm trying!" Aeryn answered through gritted teeth as she fought the effect of the wormhole on the transport pod. "It's pulling us in!!"

"Pilot!!!" Rygel shouted, "Pi-loooooott!!!"

Even as she struggled with the controls of the pod, Aeryn could feel the inexorable pull of the wormhole. She knew that her best piloting skills would not be enough to get them away from it. She looked up and saw the little blue planet beckoning to her.

"We have no choice. I can't break away," Aeryn said, her voice tense. "I don't know what else to try. The pod wasn't designed for this kind of maneuvering."

"Then do not fight it," D'Argo replied. "Resistance could damage us in such a way that we might not be able to maneuver once we're out of the wormhole."

**__**

If we come out in one piece, you mean. But Crichton came through one without any problems, right? But did he this time?

"Are you insane, Luxan?!?!" Rygel's voice rose on the last syllables. 

D'Argo and Aeryn both ignored the Hynerian. Together they worked to bring the little ship into a better alignment within the wormhole, but the craft was tossed like so much flotsam floating on the surface of an angry sea. Aeryn's breath came in ragged gasps as she fought to maintain control of the vessel.

__

I can't believe how difficult this is. Was it like this for Crichton? 

Finally the pod settled into an almost smooth – but definitely surreal – glide through the wormhole and Aeryn was required to make only minor adjustments to the attitude and pitch. 

"How long do you think this will last?" D'Argo asked.

"I'm not sure. Crichton never really talked about how long he was inside the phenomenon before," Aeryn replied, racking her brain to recall any fragment he had ever told her about his earlier experience. "I seem to remember that he said he did not notice a significant lapse in time."

"Then we might be approaching the end. We should decide what to do." D'Argo's voice was firm. "Should we attempt to find Crichton or should we return immediately through the wormhole?"

"I say we go back at once!" Rygel pounded on the console in front of him for emphasis. "We have no idea where Crichton is… we may never find him!"

"We are not going back."

Aeryn's vehement answer surprised herself as well as the others. "Not until we find him. We know the Farscape module's base telemetry and we can scan for the modifications that have been made to it."

"And what if we can't locate him? Hmmm? What happens to us if this wormhole disappears once it spits us out?" The Hynerian royal leaned forward aggressively and narrowed his eyes. "Have you thought about **_that?_**"

D'Argo turned in his seat to glare at Rygel. "If that happens, you'd better _hope_ we can find Crichton." He let that sink in for a few moments before turning to Aeryn. "Crichton once drew a map of his home world for me. There are two land masses he spoke of most often… one – Flarda – is a peninsula off one of the larger continents called Nodamerkey. The other is a large island continent called Awgstailya." D'Argo grimaced and added, "Barbaric names."

Aeryn allowed a grin to play across her lips for a brief moment at the Luxan's attempt at Crichton's native language, but then asked, "Do you think you could you recognize the land masses from orbit if we passed over them?"

D'Argo considered the question. "Yes, I believe so. I also believe he would attempt to land at either of these places… if he survived the wormhole and reentry."

"Right. We'll have to get oriented as soon as possible once we exit the wormhole. Who knows how much time we'll have..." She left unspoken the thought that they might possibly meet with armed resistance. She called over her shoulder to Rygel, "Maintain comm silence until we hear from Crichton – if we hear from him. Listen only… do you understand?"

Rygel muttered, "Aye-aye." To himself he added, "PeaceKeeper petty-tyrant." But he prepared the communications board for receive only. He wasn't afraid of her but he really didn't want to test Aeryn's resolve at the moment.

Suddenly they were thrown clear of the wormhole. The transport pod lurched for several microts until Aeryn was able to stabilize the craft. She immediately began checking the ship's systems for damage. "I'm not showing any effects from the wormhole. And it is still there." She allowed the relief she felt for that small favor to warm her voice.

"Good," D'Argo answered. "We've exited high enough to be able to enter a high orbit around the planet, although I believe we will be too high to scan for Crichton's module."

"Right. I hope you recognize something quick," Aeryn said glancing at the displays on her panel. "Some kind of satellite is tracking us. They're going to know someone is up here soon."

Meanwhile D'Argo continued to stare intently at the forward viewscreen. "Frell. Too much cloud cover… I can't see anything!" he said angrily.

"Keep looking, D'Argo." Aeryn paused and then turned once more to Rygel. "Are you picking up anything?"

"Nothing… except static… and the signal from that frelling satellite," he said. "We don't have the necessary technology aboard to block it." 

Aeryn could hear the frustration and tension in his voice. "Keep me informed," she replied. She turned back to D'Argo. "Anything yet?"

"Maybe…"

"Maybe is not good enough!" she snapped.

D'Argo shook his head in frustration and snarled, "Well, it's all you're going to get!!" 

"Sorry. Would it help if we moved into a slightly lower orbit?" she asked. "Crichton said his people don't travel in space much anymore, so maybe we could get lower without interference."

"Probably, although it is the cloud cover that is obscuring landmarks… not the altitude," the Luxan replied.

When Aeryn didn't reply immediately, D'Argo glanced at her. Her eyes were focused somewhere in the space before them; he was sure her mind was on the planet. Maybe her heart was as well…

She sensed his attention and mentally drove her own frustrations into the farthest corners of her consciousness. She checked the displays and instruments in front of her and did some rapid calculations. "We should be able to achieve a mid-level orbit in sixteen arns."

"Agreed. With any luck, maybe the cloud cover will diminish enough in that time to allow me to recognize something," D'Argo answered. He looked again at her face. "You are the experienced pilot… we will need you at your best when we approach the lower orbits. You take the first watch. Since I cannot recognize anything at this distance, wake me in six arns and I'll relieve you." With that, he pushed out of his seat and floated toward the bunk-like bench along one wall of the pod. 

"Good idea," Aeryn said thoughtfully as she continued to make adjustments to the flight program.

"And just when do **_I_** get to rest?" Rygel's words indicated indignation, but his tone was almost pitiful. He was superfluous here… and he knew it.

D'Argo halted his progress by grabbing the back of the thronesled and planted a heavy hand on Rygel's shoulder. He could feel the Hynerian tremble beneath the weight and growled, "You can sleep from now until the Dangelian inferno is quenched, for all I care. But since we may need you, wait four arns before you begin your rest period and I will wake you when it is time." Almost without being aware of it, D'Argo's own voice softened somewhat as he subconsciously tried to soothe his small companion.

Aeryn watched, amused, as D'Argo fell asleep almost immediately. She wasn't surprised that he could fall asleep at will; most warriors can. Finally she nodded and turned back to her controls and the viewscreen. 

__

Now if Rygel will just keep quiet…and leave me alone. Then again, maybe I shouldn't be alone with my thoughts right now.

~~~

"There… that is it!" D'Argo's triumphant shout echoed in the little pod.

The cloud cover had thinned appreciably by the time they achieved a near-perfect mid-level orbit just over an arn ago. So far no trace of interference or detection beyond the original tracking signal. 

During D'Argo's rest period, Aeryn had calculated how much longer their fuel would last. If they didn't go too much lower or hang around in system too long, then they should have enough fuel – maybe – to make the run back to the wormhole and Moya if they couldn't find Crichton.

"Which one do you see? Where?" Aeryn asked quietly, her eyes searching the viewscreen in front of her.

D'Argo allowed himself a moment to savor the satisfaction of remembering the details of Crichton's so-called geography lesson. "Lower quadrant, section seven. It's the large island continent, Awgstailya. Argh… what kind of frelling name is that anyway?" he growled.

"Who knows with humans, if Crichton's a typical specimen," Rygel commented dryly. "It's clearly not a royal name… sounds more like a prison if you ask me."

"Well, we didn't. Keep you eyes and ears on your board!" D'Argo barked.

"D'Argo, have you started scanning for Crichton's module yet? If that landmass is the one you think it is…" Aeryn paused a moment – she wasn't about to try to pronounce the name – before continuing, "then the other one should be visible shortly as we pass over."

"What do you want to do if we pick up traces of the module?" D'Argo asked Aeryn quietly. "Should we leave? Or do you want to try to contact him?"

Aeryn considered the ramifications of both actions. Leaving without contacting him seemed ridiculous after all they'd gone through to locate him in the first place. But contacting him might be dangerous for them all. She looked down at their remaining fuel and was stunned by what she saw.

"I don't think we'll be able to go back after all," she stated simply.

"What do you mean? I thought you said we had enough to make at least four more passes before we had to go back." 

D'Argo had spoken softly, but Rygel had picked up the muted conversation of the two warriors. "Can't go back? What do you mean we can't go back?" he asked, his voice strident with repressed anxiety.

Aeryn sighed as she glanced first at Rygel and then D'Argo. "I mean that somehow, something has consumed over half of our remaining fuel. And yes, I've already double- checked the gauges. They are functioning properly. We have no choice now… we have to locate Crichton and land wherever he is or..." Although she left her sentence unfinished, her meaning was obvious to both males.

She expected at least a show of outrage from either of them, but they both accepted her statements calmly and without apparent rancor.

They kept conversation to a minimum as they waited for the next landmark to appear. Aeryn heard D'Argo murmur occasionally and was strangely pleased to see him surreptitiously touch the talisman he always carried… the one that showed his Sebacean wife, Lo'Laan, and their son, Jothee. 

__

Maybe he is praying… I'm sure he is wondering if he will ever find Jothee now. For his sake, I hope so. Right now, I just hope we can find Crichton. John… are you there?

Aeryn was surprised to discover her own mind was calm as she watched the wide expanse of water give way to the land. She knew when D'Argo identified the second landmark – Flarda – by his sharp intake of breath. "Is that it?" she asked.

"Yes. The peninsula on the eastern coast above a group of islands guarding the mouth of a large gulf. That is Flarda." D'Argo considered for a moment and then added, "If I remember correctly, that is where his space vehicle was launched."

"Have your scans picked up anything yet?" she asked, again aware of the calm that filled the transport pod. 

D'Argo kept his eyes on the viewscreen. As the arns had passed while Aeryn slept, he had configured the transport pod's scanners to look for and locate leviathan technology. Crichton had told him once that it was radically different than anything used on Earth, so D'Argo felt confident that it would stand out like a beacon amongst the clutter of technological readings he was picking up from the planet's surface.

"Nothing. I will keep them active as we orbit, but I think our best chances of finding him will be in one of these two places… if he made it down in one piece that is." 

Aeryn heard the pessimism in the Luxan's words but ignored them. "We can make two more orbits at this altitude before we must move into a lower orbit. We need to plan what we want to do… if we do or do not find Crichton." She turned to face her companions.

__

They're not just companions. They've become friends. Even Rygel… sort of. All because of Crichton. He taught me how to accept others whom – all my life – I have been trained to see only as races to be subjugated. I hope they'll understand what I'm about to say.

"If we don't find any trace of Crichton, then I would rather die here…" she said, indicating with her hand the vast expanse of space just beyond the viewscreen. "… than become a prisoner on the planet. I'm just not sure how we'll be accepted there without him to speak for us." She paused before drawing in a deep breath and then said, "Actually, I'm not sure how we'll be treated even if he is there."

D'Argo sighed heavily. "I know your fear… I share it. If everyone on this planet is humanoid like Crichton, Rygel and I will definitely be alien to them. You," and her nodded to Aeryn, "will at least _appear_ normal to them." He turned to face the little Hynerian and gave him an unusually courteous half-bow. "Rygel, if we are unable to discover Crichton, you have my word that I will defend you to my dying breath if we choose to land. If we choose to remain in orbit, I will make sure you suffer no lingering death when our fuel and oxygen are gone." Then he turned back to Aeryn and said, "I give you the same vow, warrior to warrior. I know you will do the same for me."

Aeryn's eyes shone with unshed tears. That he – who had lost so much at the hands of her people – would make such a promise to her… She lifted her chin and pledged her life to both her friends.

Silence reigned in the pod for a while; each lost in his or her own thoughts. Finally Aeryn noticed the crescent of a bright white moon rising above the horizon of the blue and white marbled planet; the beauty of it caught in her throat. _No wonder Crichton wanted to go home. If we Sebaceans had a world like this to call home, maybe we wouldn't have become the military force of our known universe. _

Suddenly, a loud beep interrupted their reveries. D'Argo studied the panel in front of him. "He's there," he sighed, his voice a curious mix of reverence, relief and sadness. "On the island continent. Now what?"

Aeryn looked at him for a moment and then Rygel. "We land," she stated simply.

After only a moment's hesitation, they both nodded. She turned to her panel and began to calculate the trajectory that would bring them in as close as possible to Crichton's signal. After several microts she said, "It may be a bit rough, but I think we can get there in just four – maybe five – more increasingly lower orbits. The only thing that might change that is if we encounter any interference as we approach."

"Understood."

~~~

Aeryn spent the descent recalculating their remaining fuel and pulling every trick she'd ever learned in flight school to extend that disappearing resource. She was at a loss to explain why this ordinary planetary system seemed to be draining the fuel right out of their reserves. She also rechecked their trajectory and plotted it to within a metra of Crichton's module.

Finally she turned to her companions and said, "This is it. This is our last orbit before we enter the atmosphere. The pod is already experiencing the pull of the planet's gravity."

__

Soon…

"We should enter the planet's atmosphere in less than 200 microts, but I do not know how long the entry phase should be, she added.

"Don't worry. We will be ready for whatever comes, Aeryn," D'Argo answered resolutely.

__

I wish I were as sure of that as you, my friend. 

"Hold on… we are now entering Earth's atmosphere." Aeryn grinned to herself as she remembered when Crichton had painstakingly taught her how to _say_ "Earth". 

"If they are planning any sort of interference or defensive measures, now will be the time to expect it," D'Argo shouted over the noise of entry.

"Ever the optimist, eh, D'Argo? You are such a cheerful companion." Rygel's voice fairly oozed with sarcasm. D'Argo just grinned over his shoulder at the Hynerian royal.

Aeryn smiled again as she listened to their needling comments. 

__

Thank you, Crichton. No matter what happens now, you've managed to show me things – and beings – I'd never thought to see. Now… just be there when we land. You can't be gone from us… from me. 

Not now. 

THE END


End file.
